Poems are usually hard to write,
I honesty don't know what to say,
So I suppose I'll just flow like a flying kite,
That's a simile right? Well, anyway...
I'm supposed to include a lot of things
Inside this poem before it ends,
An onomatopoeia; something like "bing,"
An alliteration, my fine feathered friend.
I struggle to find, the correct rhyme,
As the computer screen stares me down,
My mind is like a clock that doesn't tell time,
Oh, it seems that's a rhyme I've found.
This poem is now coming to a close,
Like a movie that everybody loved,
I need one more smile before I go...
...This poem is like a flock of doves...
I really like this poem because of how high spirited it is. I also like this poem because of how you included the names of what you were supposed to include in the poem as well. For you, I think more sarcasim in your poems would be good. But also being serious at the right times too. A B A B C D C D E F E F G H G H
ReplyDeleteYou had a very high spirited and happy tone.
Diction - "as the computer screen stares me down"
"I need one more smile before I go"
and, "...This poem is like a flock of doves..."
Imagery - "So I suppose I'll just flow like a flying kite"
Alliteration - "An alliteration, my fine feathered friend." In the second stanza, fourth line. I don't see an internal rhyme. Maybe you could say "An onomatopoeia' something like 'bing bing'. " so that it becomes an internal rhyme. When you say "As the computer screen stares me down," is personification. In the third stanza, second line.
Your onomatopoeia was "bing" in the second stanza, third line.
Jayla Shade
I loved the comedy in the poem and how you stated what to say. I would suggest more metaphors/similes to explain what needs to be said, as well as a little more imagery.
ReplyDelete1.)The rhyme scheme of the poem is ABAB
2.)The poet's tone is straight-forward as well as confused
3.) Comparing poem to a kite, a movie everyone loved, and a clock that doesn't tell time
4.) My mind is like a clock that doesn't tell time (line three, stanza three)
5.) My fine feathered friend (line four, stanza two)
6.) I'll flow like a flying kite, thats a simile right? (line three-four, stanza one)
7.) As the computer screen stares me down (line line two, stanza two)
8.) something like "bing"(line three, stanza three)
Morgan Graebe
Willie, I love this poem because it truly talks about all the complications of writing a poem, and it creatively threw in all of the requirements for the poem as well. Improvements? I can't think of a single one.
ReplyDelete1.ABAB
2.Relaxed and fun
3.All of your sentences were really creative
4.I don't think we were supposed to use imagery
5.Fine feathered friend
6.I struggle to find, the correct rhyme
7.Computer screen stares me down
8.An onomatopoeia; something like "bing,"
-Franchesca
I like how the author uses humor in the poem. I also like how the poem develops along with the author’s train of thought, and is written while the reader is thinking about it.
ReplyDeleteOne way to improve would be to add more imagery to illustrate your points. Another way to improve would be to explain “my fine feathered friend” and make it flow a little more with the poem.
1. Rhyme scheme of this poem is abab
2.The poem’s tone is funny, a little confused, and humorous.
3. Comparing poem to a flying kite illustrates the way a poem flows. Correct rhyme is used instead of right rhyme, which was interesting. My mind is like a clock that doesn't tell time lets the reader understand the level of confusion.
4. “Flow like a flying kite” is an example of imagery and paints the picture of a kite flying in the wind, and is found in line three, stanza one.
5. “My fine feathered friend” is an alliteration and is in line four, stanza two.
6. Internal rhyme: “I struggle to find, the correct rhyme” is in line one, stanza three.
7. Personification” “As the computer screen stares me down” gives computers the human quality of staring. It is in line two, stanza two.
8. Onomatopoeia:"bing" is in line three, stanza three.
Kelly Chen
1) This poem was about writing poems and what to put in it.
ReplyDelete2)Did you struggle to find rhymes?
3)Do you enjoy writing poems or are they hard to write?
4)Did you have a hard time writing this poem?
similes/metahpors
I'll just flow like a flying kite, my mind is like a clock that doesn't tell time, like a movie that everybody loved, this poem is like a flock of doves
poem- rhyming, metahpors, stanzas, thinking, tone
Maria Williams
1 poem is about how hard it is to write poems
ReplyDelete2 Why was it hard for you to make rhymes
3 Was it easy for you to write this poem
4 Do you like writing poems like this
I'll just flow like a flying kite, my mind is like a clock that doesn't tell time, like a movie that everybody loved, this poem is like a flock of doves
poem-metaphors rhyming stanzas
Pretty sweet.
ReplyDelete-Alijah Martin