Staring at an empty paper canvas
Not done 'til I sign
$ y m b O | z slide while I conduct
Thesewordsflowtogether
Buzz in my head
They Dance in time
Sing songs of soul
These words are my message
This paper- my bottle
This line is Mine.
(... That was too easy!)
But writing this now,
I'm set in BoringAssignedRequiremantS
Personification. Alliteration. Rythm & Rhyme
I feel poetik liscense is no longer sure.
~Cyrydwynn
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed all the fancy font n such. The format is really awesome.
ReplyDeleteI really can't think of anything to improve...it's pretty fantastic. Like I said, I'm printing this out.
1. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, C, K, L, M, G, N, O, C, P
2. To ME, your tone was calm, relaxed, soothing.
3. The way you typed symbols, BARS, and poetic license were awesome.
4. These words are my message, my paper-my bottle. Good imagery.
5. Sing song of soul. Alliteration. You used S!
6. Internal Rhyme: line is Mine. line and mine rhyme.
7. Dance in time was the personification. Time can't dance, silly goose.
8. Buzz, was an onomatopoeia. I like it.
Anna Smith.
Anna Smith.
I can't understand what some of your lines are saying.
ReplyDeleteBrenna L
You seem really artistic feeling. But it does look a tad bit..overdone.
ReplyDeleteI love the crossed out lines-- very post-modern. I think (and maybe I'm off-base here) that your point in having so many font changes was to satirize poets who use such devices (e.e. cummings comes to mind). Am I right on that?
ReplyDeleteDr. Benson
I think personally, you worked to hard on making it look good, and less time writing a real poem. To be perfectly honest, the words don't fit together well, they don't rhyme a lot, and they don't push or even create a type of story. Perhaps you shoulod have focused less on what your text looks like and more on what it said. Sorry but it just dosen't work.
ReplyDeleteThe last comment was from Jacob witmer
ReplyDeleteThe poem is about freedom , and what not.
ReplyDeleteone question i have for a particular line of the poem is why did you capitolize BARS?
one question i have for a particular stanza is why did you use more editing int hte first stanza then in hte rest?
One question i have about the entire poem is why use editing effects?
Sing songs of soul, $ y m b O | z slide while I conduct, I feel poetik liscense is no longer sure,They Dance in time.
one thing i feel is symbolic is I feel poetik liscense is no longer sure, makes me think of freedom being taken away, and somewhat sadness as a toneing, it shows me visions of prison cells.
^^ that was from ashley xD^^
ReplyDeleteThe poem is about poems, and how it's hard to write freely because there are rules restricting what you can write.
ReplyDeleteOn the last line, why did you spell poetic license like poetik liscense?
Reagannn