I'm standing on a stone in the sky
Oh boy, am i up high,
Watching the birds soar around,
I stayed put on the rock, my feet were bound
Whoosh the wind whispers and I almost fall,
I look down above them all,
Tiny specks like dust I can barely see,
So glad I shout with glee, happy as can be
I can stand here all day long
Singing my favorite song,
As high as a cloud,
Singin' real loud
Soon it turns cool
Like a refreshing dive in the pool,
I take a breath and frown,
Because I realize I have to climb back down
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ReplyDeleteYo court, dats a sick poem hommie. I liked how you said that it was refreshing like a dive in the pool, that was tight. That was also sick how you shouted out with glee, must have been pretty happy.
ReplyDeleteI think you need to fix up your rhyme scheme though. In the Second stanza you had five lines insted of four, thats trippy. And i didnt get the part where it says my feet were bound. that confused me until i thought about it.
1. The rhyme scheme was A, A, B, B.
2. The tone was happy and cheerful until you relized you had to climb back down.
3. Three intresting uses of diction were bound, soar, and glee
4. An example of imagery could be when she says "oh boy am i up high."
5. Whoosh the wind wispers is when alliteration was used and it was in line 5.
6. She didn't use internal rhyme.
7. The wind whispers the personification in line 5.
8. Whoosh is onomatopoeia on line 5.
Trevor Russell
6.
I like the part were it says a dive in the pool it sounds like it is really refreshing. I like how you added that you had to climb back down the mountain once you were done.
ReplyDeleteA couple things that you could have fixed is the rhyme scheme.Also in the second stanza you had 5 lines.
1)A A B B
2)It sounds like you were happy and you wanted to stay up there
3)A couple words of good diction were soar glee and refreshing
4)Aline of imagery is in the first stanza whe you said that you watch the birds soar around you
5)the wind wispers is a alliteration in line 5
6)didnt use 1
7)the wispering wind was a personifation.
8)woosh was an onomatopoeia
Mackenzie Lawrence
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ReplyDeleteThis poem is about being at peace with yourself, and maybe your surroundings. Or maybe sneaking away to your own fantasy world, and realizing that you have to come back to reality. Who are you looking down on? (second stanza, second line)Why can't you stay in your happy place for as long as you want to?(third stanza) What exactly are you escaping from, and where are you really? Simile: "tiny specks like dust, i can barely see" - "as high as a cloud" - "like a refreshing dive in the pool" - "happy as can be" Allusion: "I'm standing on a stone in the sky" - independence, carefree, stress free, happy, calm, patient, and determined.
ReplyDelete-Jayla Shade
1) This poem is about standing on top of a mountain, and being free and happy.
ReplyDelete2) One question I have about a particular line of the poem is, why did you choose to use "I'm standing on a stone in the sky"?
3) One question I have about a particular stanza of the poem is, stanza 4,