There's too many stars
And not enough sky.
We cover things
Like blankets,
Leaving the truth
Behind.
No shame should be
Brought from ourselves.
Love and hatred has
Become one,
No cherished hearts
Evermore.
What have we done?
Where has humanity gone?
Too interested in evil,
Too much violence in mind.
Fear is the wind
Sweeping through all,
Cackling in the
Ears of the faint.
Pain is the norm,
Something now
Not noticed by
The strongest.
Hear cries from children;
They are the beaten souls.
Be hands outstretched,
A rescue.
Become above this race,
Above this time.
Let's go back.
I really like the first 2 lines a lot. I think it gives good imagery. I also like how you described love starting to turn to hatred and violence.
ReplyDeleteI would like to see more imagery in the second half of the poem. I also think you should use more onomatopoeias.
1) There is no rhyme scheme.
2) The poet's tone sounds somewhat depressed and a little angered and disappointed that the world is becoming violent.
3) I think "Where has humanity gone?" is an interesting use of diction. It makes me think about everything that has happened in our world.
4) One example of imagery is "There are too many stars and not enough sky."
5) An alliteration was used in the line "No shame should be".
6)There is no internal rhyme.
7) Personification was used in the line "They are beaten souls." Beaten souls is the personification.
8) Onomatopoeia was not used.
It's a pretty poem :) I love it!!
Rachel Tallman :)
I absolutely love this poem! It is very deep and I can you are very articulate and interesting. It shows is a very creative way how you believe the world is.
ReplyDeleteThe only suggestions I can think of is the beginning does flow as well as the ending. I think Evermore is good as one sentence but Behind is not.
1) There is none.
2) The poet's tone is disappointed.
3) I liked when you simple wrote "Let's go back" it end the poem perfectly! I also liked "there are too many stars and not enough sky" describes how the world has become so mixed up. I also liked "Love and hatred has become one" it is a great way to show your feelings in the poem.
4) One example is of imagery was "to much violence in mind" it is easy to imagine people using violence.
5)No shame should be-7
6)No
7)Beaten souls-18
8)No
Abby Foster <3
I really enjoyed the comparison between covering things up in the world as if we used a blanket. I loved this poem though! It has a good point! (:
ReplyDeleteAn improvement might be to make your stanzas a little bit longer.
1) There was no rhyme scheme.
2)I think that the poet's tone was disappointed in what the people have made/done to the world.
3) Where has humanity gone?
There's too amny stars.
Hear crys from children.
4)There's too amny stars in the sky.
5)No shame should.....line 7
6)Internal rhyme was notn used.
7)There are beaten souls...line 18.
8)Onomatopoeia was not used.
Ashley Schifano! (:
I really like how i was iinterested in it, it made sense.
ReplyDeletePut more lines in the stanzas and have a rhyme scheme.
1. There was no rhyme scheme.
2. The poet's tone was depressed and disappointed.
3. Where has humanity gone?
There's too many stars
Hear cries from children
4. Too many stars in the sky
5. shame should in line 7.
6. No internal rhyme.
7. Beaten souls in line 18.
8. No onomatopoeia.
Makayla Schmidt (:
This poem was about how humans are taking over the Earth, and how we are covering things up.
ReplyDeleteMy question about a line is about line 7. Why should people not be ashamed or disappointed about what they have done and how they have hurt the Earth.
My question about a stanza is about stanza 6. How are we evil about hurting the Earth? I know that this is a bad thing, but maytbe not evil.
My question about the entire poem, is What inspired you to write about this topic?
My favorite stanza that is a symobol in my opinion was, "There's too many stars, and not enough sky. We cover things like blankets." I like how that symbolizes covering things and not being able to see what the real Earth used to be.
Ashley Schifano! (:
1. This poem is about the fall of humanity.
ReplyDelete2. What did you mean by "fear is the wind" in line 17?
3. In stanza 9, were you refering to child abuse?
4. Is this poem telling us to rise above what the rest of the world is doing?
I could only find 2 simile/metaphors. They were "We cover things, like blankets" and "Fear is the wind."
Symbolism was shown in "There's too many stars, and not enough sky." It refers to having to much of something that is seemingly good.