"Little Cup"
The porcelain cup is so white and shiny,
to which a giant would think is very tiny.
Its smooth sides scream touch me!
The exact opposite of a bee.
It sits on the counter so lonely and still,
like a windmill on top of the hill.
Nobody around to help it out,
for the poor little cup could only shout.
It sat on the edge scared to fall,
staring at the wide white wall.
What will happen when it fall off and breaks?
Crash! It shattered like dropped corn flakes.
The poor little cup is now in pieces
just like the heart of one of my nieces.
Now she has a new cup made of plastic,
which bounces back just like elastic.
http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/2544408/Untitled
-Tow aspects of the poem I like are the creativity and the diction.
ReplyDelete-I don't really have any suggestions to iprove this other than the length.
1)The rhyme scheme is A,B,B,A.
2)The tone of this poem seems to be happy.
3)The only interesting use of diction was corn flakes.
4)When I read this poem I imagined a tiny white cut falling and breaking.
5)Alliteration was used in line 3.
6)An example of internal rhyme was in line 6.
7)No personification.
8)Onomotapeia was used in line 8.
Emma:)
The entire poem is about a cup. The cup broke. I'd like to know how is broke. Don't like line 4. 1. AABB 2. neutral 3. porcelain not sure what it means, bee I like bees, elastic not very bouncy 4. shatters like dropped corn flakes easy to imagine 5. line 3 smooth side scream 6. windmill on top of the hill 6 7. NA 8. Crash 8
ReplyDeleteRiver Hames
I meant the rhyme scheme was A,A,B,B.
ReplyDeleteEmma:)
p.s. woops!
- I liked your choice of words and diction.
ReplyDelete- What does a bee have to do with anything?
1.) Your rhyme scheme was AA, BB.
2.) The tone is kind of weird. It's like your emotions keep changing.
3.) Diction- breaks and corn flakes, plastic and elastic, shiny tiny.
4.) Imagery- The sound of the cup dropping.
5.) Alliteration- "Its smooth sides scream touch me!" line 3
6.) Internal Rhyme- "like a windmill on top of the hill." line 6
7.) Personification- "Its smooth sides scream touch me!" line 3
8.) Onomatopoeia- "Crash!" line 8
edited by ELAINA SMITH! :)
why did you use corn flakes?
ReplyDeleteI had nothing else to really rhyme with breaks.
ReplyDelete1) It's about a cup.
ReplyDelete2) I have no question for any lines.
3) In stanza 4, why do you talk about your heart-broken niece, if you don't even have a niece?
4) What gave you the idea to right about a cup?
Similes/ Metaphors
-like a windmill on top of the hill.
-It shattered like dropped corn flakes.
-The poor little cup is now in pieces
just like the heart of one of my nieces.
-which bounces back just like elastic.
This poem symbolizes a Wall. Lonely, white, plain, still
The poem is about a cup falling off a counter.
ReplyDeleteHow did you think of corn flakes? thats very creative.
No questions about a particular stanza.
How did you think of so many uses of personifactions and smilies/ metaphors? Its impressive :)
"which bounces back just like elastic. "
"just like the heart of one of my nieces."
"Crash! It shattered like dropped corn flakes."
"like a windmill on top of the hill."
Cup: plates, drinks, porcelin, china, glass, falling, crashing, white, shiny
zoey.
1.) It doesn't matter whether I have a niece or not.
ReplyDelete2.) I don't really know how I came up with the idea to write about a cup. I was sitting trying to come up with an idea and my cup was sitting in front of me and when i reached for it I almost knocked it off the table. So I decided to write about a cup falling off of a counter.
1.) I came up with corn flakes because I was trying to think of a word that rhymes with breaks. I thought of flakes and I didn't know how to use the word other than corn flakes.
ReplyDelete2.) I really don't remember how I came up with so many metaphors/similies. I just needed words that rhymed and they just kind of came to me.
that was a random topic
ReplyDeleteWho thinks it's random?
ReplyDeletewhy is your nieces heart in peices
ReplyDeletebecause it was her cup and she was upset about it falling off and breaking.
ReplyDelete